$60 Craig’s List Find

Before:

During:

After:

Paint is Garden Trowel by Magnolia Home:

 

Happiness and relationships.

In my last relationship, there was a huge fundamental flaw that I never noticed. Both him and I were looking for happiness and fulfillment within each other rather than focusing on achieving happiness and fulfillment within. He expected me to make him happy and fulfilled and I expected him to make me happy and fulfilled. It was a bad approach on so many levels such as:

1. That is entirely too much pressure to put on someone.
2. You can never find true happiness by looking for someone else or something else to give it to you.
3. It is a lazy approach that shows you are unwilling to take the responsibility of defining your own happiness.

I now approach my relationship as we are both grown adults who are responsible for our own happiness in life, but we are also partners who seek to make each other happier. Own your own happiness and then rock life with your other half – it is a whole hell of a lot better that way.

Shitty values.

I have been reading a very hilarious and helpful book. It has brought me to tears from laughing so hard and it has often left me deep in thought from the simple yet profound statements in it. The above image is under “Shitty Values” and it sat so well with me that I wanted to share.

When I have found myself in a shitty situation and been pissed off or, ya know, feeling shitty about it, I have had people tell me that “life is 10% about what happens to you and 90% about how you react to it.” Nobody needs to be positive all the time. There isn’t always positive in every situation. It is okay to be real and raw with your emotions and admit that you feel defeated by life at the moment. It is okay to sing Limp Bizkit’s “Break Stuff” on repeat to help prevent you from completely losing your shit. That doesn’t mean it’s okay to lose your shit and be unkind or unruly, but it does mean that it is okay to admit you aren’t loving your life at the moment and the shit that is being thrown at you is indeed bothersome. Live your true feelings and realize it’s not always sunshine, rainbows, and butterflies.

The “plump” in plumply honest.

Yep, that’s it right there. Despite a headache that turned into an all day migraine, I made this ravioli lasagna and I feel like a damn champ. 💪🏻

Some greenery.

 

When all else fails.

Take a bubble bath and listen to sad songs on Pandora. It helps.

Technology helps fuel romance if you let it.

There you were, just standing in the kitchen as your adorable, handsome self. I came up to you and we embraced each other in that way we always do and you started dancing with me. I then said the words. “Okay, Google, play love songs.” She then mumbled something about beats between the sheets and as you can imagine, freaky tunes started. “Damnit, Google, get your mind out of the gutter. Okay, Google, play Boyz II Men.” She started playing some good R&B and we continued dancing. I then really upped the romance by getting Google to turn the TV off and dim the lights to 15%. We finished our dance, but we also made sure to get some sarcasm, laughs, and kisses in there.

There’s nobody in this world I would rather dance in the kitchen with while making starter boyfriend jokes and ultimately deciding we would have to split the waffle iron and have open faced waffles if I ever left after being new and improved (complete with a sports car, fancy knives, a better job, and a new house). Thank you for being my partner, my constant, my biggest supporter, my best friend (with benefits 😏), and someone that gets me so completely.

Good morning.

Self care.

Self care wasn’t really something I had thought about until recently. I previously would do things that I thought made me feel “good,” but I was doing things that made me feel good in the moment instead of looking at the bigger picture. Recently I’ve come to practice self care and self love and I truly want to practice this more often. Do things that make me feel good in the moment, but also make sure those things are good for my mind, body, and soul with a lasting impact. Here are some of the simple things that help me practice self care that I plan to do more of:

• yoga
• meditation
• a glass of good wine (not the whole bottle)
• reading more
• being kind
• exercise
• cleaning the apartment
• lighting a candle and making sure to blow it out with a lid later on
• my favorite Pandora stations
• cooking a delicious meal (and not having to clean the dishes after)
• taking walks
• sleeping in past 9am on a weekend
• a good skincare routine
• bubble baths
• face masks (bonus to ones that you can peel off)
• creating something
• snuggling up in a blanket, sweater, comfy pants, and most importantly fuzzy socks
• doing that workout I really didn’t want to do and feeling like Wonder Woman for doing it
• actually going to the doctor even though I really do not want to
• being in the moment and truly allowing myself to be vulnerable
• striving to be a better person
• forgiving bad behavior
• taking the stairs
• driving the long way home to finish the song
• writing more
• reaching out to the people that bring me joy and making time for them
• planning for the future while living in the moment
• giving less %#*&s
• driving the speed limit rather than exceeding it unnecessarily
• the art of photography
• learning new things whether it be professionally, a new recipe, a life skill, or becoming a better person through the often tough life lessons
• choosing the healthy food option over the delicious thing that will make me feel like garbage later (I’m looking at you, macaroni and cheese and ice cream)
• cursing less and using the better vocabulary my mother swears I have (side note: my vocabulary actually really sucks)
• celebrating the small victories

I’m by no means a rock star at any of these, but I recognize that these are things that truly make me happy with myself and bring me contentment. These are things I am going to try to do more of in order to practice self care and love.

 

Can we show how we actually feel on social media?

I think the majority of us have at least that one frustrating friend on social media that drives us bonkers for some reason or another. There are the pretenders, the debbie downers, the marketers, and the oversharers.

The Pretenders

These are the people that post so many happy things that they must be unhappy. Clearly these people aren’t truly happy and they are just using social media as an attempt to reaffirm their happiness.

The Debbie Downers

These are our friends who are just disgruntled misfits who will clearly never be happy with their lives simply because they are venting on a social media source. These people definitely aren’t just having a bad day, week, month, hell, maybe even year.

The Marketers

We probably all have at least one friend trying to get us to buy Juice Plus, Mary Kay, It Works, etc because they don’t want to get a “real job.” They’re clearly not doing this to earn some extra cash to support themselves or their family and they probably don’t have faith in the product they’re selling either.

The Oversharers

These are the people that share everything down to how their kid is eating peas for the 18th time and still does not enjoy them (and they often provide picture evidence in multiple photos). They’re obviously not just really digging the (rather nifty) concept that is social media and staying connected to a larger audience of people.

I’ve had my frustrations with each and every one of these social networkers and I’ve complained about them too, but what was the point and why did I care so much? Was I so unhappy in my own life that I couldn’t enjoy someone else’s happiness through a simple Facebook post? Is being open about your life being crappy at the moment really that bad? Is venting and looking for words of encouragement from your friends to brighten your gloomy day a little bit really that bad? Is trying to make a little money on the side bad? I won’t get offended by whatever you’re trying to sell me as long as you don’t get offended by me not wanting to buy it. Is dealing with loneliness, boredom, or just liking your friends to know what is going on in your life something to really be frowned upon?

At what point did it become unacceptable or acceptable to share certain things on social media? In the past 5 years or so, I have only tried to post positive things on social networking websites or find the humor in the negative things. I’m over “social media etiquette” and if I’m having a particularly bad day or feeling a certain way and want to share it, I’m going to even if it’s not deemed as “acceptable.” I’ve been really off recently and I’m not going to pretend like everything is fine and dandy when it’s not. Moving sucks. Moving during finals weeks really sucks. Moving during finals week when your boyfriend is traveling for work sucks even more than that. Not knowing if your college major is right for you (when you’ve essentially crossed the point of no return) does not give you warm fuzzies and puts you on the brink of a meltdown instead. Having it get dark out earlier is not ideal for your mood when a lack of sunlight is really good at making you unhappy.

It is okay to feel a certain way and show you feel that way, but you just need to process these feelings in a healthy way. I am not in an ideal state, but I am working towards getting into one. It is okay to say this and people need to learn to be okay with people feeling a certain way and expressing those feelings.